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SO HUMAN...
May 20th, 2011
What a life! Or should I say UN-life? I've had so much fun here, and most of the time we weren't doing anything! I don't have to try to fit in here, I just do. And when I have a bad day and am brooding about, nobody badgers me about it, they just leave me be until I'm ready to party again.
Rodrick and I are like- like brothers. We share the same opinions and often the same likes and dislikes.
More than once I have felt a twinge of sadness thinking about the others in Kerry. I am wondering if the house is done yet and if Jordan's child has been born. Has Johanna come searching for me?
No.
I can't do that to myself anymore, I just can't! I had feelings stronger than life for her, and she destroyed them. She rejected them, me. I promised myself I would never think of her again. I told myself I was done with her....and now I will be.
"What's this? A diary?" Arion says ripping it from my hands.
"No. Its not. Now give it back." I lash out but he slips from my grasp.
"'Oh, Johanna'" He flips a page, "'Johanna, Johanna, Johanna'" He raises his voice as we enter the main room.
"Give it back!" I keep shouting.
He ignores me, "'Johanna, my heart beats for you! You make me feel like a better person!'" A pause, "See who your "brother" is, Rodrick? He's not one of us." Arion says as he shoves this into my chest.
Rodrick was about to say something but my vision clouded in red as I tackled Arion to the floor.
I punched and tore and bit whatever I saw. That's what he gets for trying to scare me off! This is what he gets for trying to ruin me! This is what that lowly coward gets for thinking he's better than me!!
Soon, I am the center of attention with everyone else standing around us encouraging the fight. But that's all Arion needed, he likes the encouragement. He shoves me into the bar top and I claw at his neck. He tries to punch me and misses by an inch so I grab his arm and pull. He is angry...and so am I.
I hate wasting my energy on something so stupid, something so not worth it. I start to feel this warmth inside me, and it starts spreading and spreading until my finger tips feel like they're on fire.
Arion runs at me, I raise my palm to him and the next thing I know, he's on fire.
I am shocked. (Well, not as shocked as Arion was! Hah!)
Stormy puts out Arion's fire and Lara accompanies him into a back room to make sure he will be okay.
So I stand there, in the center of the ring, with my palms up, feeling just as angry and ready for another fight.
"Who's next?" I ask.
They all look excited, especially Brielle.
'No more of that. Let's go.'
And then Rodrick and I are alone in his private room.
"Rodrick, come on! I want another fight!"
"Well, that isn't what you need. You need to learn how to control yourself. You can't just go around cooking up every person that gets you angry."
"I'm not angry." I try to lie. But he sees through me.
"It doesn't matter. If you walk around cooking up people, they're going to know you have some old vampire blood in you."
I look at my hands, "THIS comes with age?!" I ask, "What else?"
He deals me a blow to the back of the head for that.
"Why are you angry? That Arion stole your book?"
"There are private thoughts in there." I growl.
"And a human girl, I suspect." Before I can say anything, defend myself, he continues on, "Its only human, Gabriel. Those emotions will die eventually, you needn't fear."
"When? When will they die? They've caused me nothing but pain."
"I wasn't born with such emotions, I don't really know. Don't let them "cause you pain", that's human also. All emotion is human, and we aren't human. We don't need those."
"But-"
"We serve a higher purpose, Gabriel," His finger is pointing up but then he moves it so it points down, "So start acting like it. Go for a hunt."
I exit his room and recruit everyone except Arion and Lara to go hunting.
It was a very dark and rainy night out. And thanks to Stormy, it got even worse.
Lightning crackled and thunder roared.
We took to the woods, with me in the lead, and searched for our prey. Eventually, we found a family camping in the woods. A mother, a father, and 2 children.
The parents fights were feeble.
And the children cried out for their mommy and daddy.
"Mommy and Daddy couldn't save you. They were to weak." I say to the kids.
"But mommy said she'd always protect us." The little girl says.
"She lied." Stormy laughs.
The girl starts crying and so does her brother.
"No tears." Reaper smiles, "Your the man of the family now. So start acting like it." They all have themselves a good laugh.
"Mommy didn't lie, she was just way too weak against us," I say.
Brielle comes over and takes the little girl from my grasp. I thought she was going to lead her away from all of this, if only I knew. She slowly and painfully sucked the little girl dry as the brother and I watched.
"I want to be just like you!" The boy shouts at me.
"Yeah. I bet you do." I say as I break his neck and take his blood.
I don't want to admit it, but I felt for those kids. I almost couldn't do it, couldn't kill them, but I did.
We bury the bodies and run out of the forest, me at the front of this Creepy band of Corpses, and we never look back.
That family doesn't get a special good bye or a special death, what separates them from all the others?
Nope. Their faces just blend into the wall of all the other faces that I've killed, nameless, ageless, they all die.
We all die somehow, someday....except for those who never die......those who live forever.
Leaving that forest, I felt sadness and regret....
But, hey, "Its only human", right?
-Gabriel
May 20th, 2011
What a life! Or should I say UN-life? I've had so much fun here, and most of the time we weren't doing anything! I don't have to try to fit in here, I just do. And when I have a bad day and am brooding about, nobody badgers me about it, they just leave me be until I'm ready to party again.
Rodrick and I are like- like brothers. We share the same opinions and often the same likes and dislikes.
More than once I have felt a twinge of sadness thinking about the others in Kerry. I am wondering if the house is done yet and if Jordan's child has been born. Has Johanna come searching for me?
No.
I can't do that to myself anymore, I just can't! I had feelings stronger than life for her, and she destroyed them. She rejected them, me. I promised myself I would never think of her again. I told myself I was done with her....and now I will be.
"What's this? A diary?" Arion says ripping it from my hands.
"No. Its not. Now give it back." I lash out but he slips from my grasp.
"'Oh, Johanna'" He flips a page, "'Johanna, Johanna, Johanna'" He raises his voice as we enter the main room.
"Give it back!" I keep shouting.
He ignores me, "'Johanna, my heart beats for you! You make me feel like a better person!'" A pause, "See who your "brother" is, Rodrick? He's not one of us." Arion says as he shoves this into my chest.
Rodrick was about to say something but my vision clouded in red as I tackled Arion to the floor.
I punched and tore and bit whatever I saw. That's what he gets for trying to scare me off! This is what he gets for trying to ruin me! This is what that lowly coward gets for thinking he's better than me!!
Soon, I am the center of attention with everyone else standing around us encouraging the fight. But that's all Arion needed, he likes the encouragement. He shoves me into the bar top and I claw at his neck. He tries to punch me and misses by an inch so I grab his arm and pull. He is angry...and so am I.
I hate wasting my energy on something so stupid, something so not worth it. I start to feel this warmth inside me, and it starts spreading and spreading until my finger tips feel like they're on fire.
Arion runs at me, I raise my palm to him and the next thing I know, he's on fire.
I am shocked. (Well, not as shocked as Arion was! Hah!)
Stormy puts out Arion's fire and Lara accompanies him into a back room to make sure he will be okay.
So I stand there, in the center of the ring, with my palms up, feeling just as angry and ready for another fight.
"Who's next?" I ask.
They all look excited, especially Brielle.
'No more of that. Let's go.'
And then Rodrick and I are alone in his private room.
"Rodrick, come on! I want another fight!"
"Well, that isn't what you need. You need to learn how to control yourself. You can't just go around cooking up every person that gets you angry."
"I'm not angry." I try to lie. But he sees through me.
"It doesn't matter. If you walk around cooking up people, they're going to know you have some old vampire blood in you."
I look at my hands, "THIS comes with age?!" I ask, "What else?"
He deals me a blow to the back of the head for that.
"Why are you angry? That Arion stole your book?"
"There are private thoughts in there." I growl.
"And a human girl, I suspect." Before I can say anything, defend myself, he continues on, "Its only human, Gabriel. Those emotions will die eventually, you needn't fear."
"When? When will they die? They've caused me nothing but pain."
"I wasn't born with such emotions, I don't really know. Don't let them "cause you pain", that's human also. All emotion is human, and we aren't human. We don't need those."
"But-"
"We serve a higher purpose, Gabriel," His finger is pointing up but then he moves it so it points down, "So start acting like it. Go for a hunt."
I exit his room and recruit everyone except Arion and Lara to go hunting.
It was a very dark and rainy night out. And thanks to Stormy, it got even worse.
Lightning crackled and thunder roared.
We took to the woods, with me in the lead, and searched for our prey. Eventually, we found a family camping in the woods. A mother, a father, and 2 children.
The parents fights were feeble.
And the children cried out for their mommy and daddy.
"Mommy and Daddy couldn't save you. They were to weak." I say to the kids.
"But mommy said she'd always protect us." The little girl says.
"She lied." Stormy laughs.
The girl starts crying and so does her brother.
"No tears." Reaper smiles, "Your the man of the family now. So start acting like it." They all have themselves a good laugh.
"Mommy didn't lie, she was just way too weak against us," I say.
Brielle comes over and takes the little girl from my grasp. I thought she was going to lead her away from all of this, if only I knew. She slowly and painfully sucked the little girl dry as the brother and I watched.
"I want to be just like you!" The boy shouts at me.
"Yeah. I bet you do." I say as I break his neck and take his blood.
I don't want to admit it, but I felt for those kids. I almost couldn't do it, couldn't kill them, but I did.
We bury the bodies and run out of the forest, me at the front of this Creepy band of Corpses, and we never look back.
That family doesn't get a special good bye or a special death, what separates them from all the others?
Nope. Their faces just blend into the wall of all the other faces that I've killed, nameless, ageless, they all die.
We all die somehow, someday....except for those who never die......those who live forever.
Leaving that forest, I felt sadness and regret....
But, hey, "Its only human", right?
-Gabriel