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Hello diary
i hope you slept well yes? Ahh good well Afton is here to write in you i must say i am interested in this bit i want to hear what my husband got up to while i wasn’t there, Afton is a very good looking vampire and well with me gone who knows who wanted a bit of him you won’t lie to me or keep secrets what Afton shares with you, you will tell me right? “Chelsea you’re doing it again hunny it’s a diary to write your thoughts down not a friend" what’s that you will tell me? Ahh thank you diary here is Afton for you.
Ok here i am made to write in you again, we are not even at the good bit yet the fighting scene well that’s just amazing, I’m joking by the way all of this totally pointless it was a fair fight and the better clan one there end of story.
Fine i am being shouted at to finish the story it’s not worth the fight with my wife she is tactful and all ways wins mostly because she doesn’t look very good angry her face gets wrinkles not an attractive look i am so glad she will never age otherwise i mite of had to dump her for a younger model ha-ha you see this is how Chelsea thinks she assumes when she is out of the picture i am ready to go find a new mate how wrong she is the truth is i would love to of grown old with her to meet her and know its love at first sight, for us to go on dates and just human stuff but that wasn’t possible when i met Chelsea i was already a vampire i could smell this beautiful scent it called to me almond and vanilla, sweet but nutty that’s my wife summed up in one ha no she is far more to me then that i followed the scent and it bought me into this club she was dancing when i first laid eyes on her lost in her own world she didn’t notice me or anyone i sat in that club all night and watched her dance after i left i wanted to find out about this beauty i gathered all my information she was a sad lonely girl ran away from home and this was her job making as much money she can to pay the jerk who owned the club he pushed his girls into more than dancing and Chelsea often did little extras that’s how i stole her since that day we haven’t been apart maybe a day at the most but now she was gone to get help and i had no idea when i would see her Chelsea thinks that i just thought Ohh well who is next to come and take her place no one could ever take her place never i sat outside at night where i saw her last and i kept her image in my head.
Tristan joined me he was listing to some music on his iPod.
He took out his head phones
"Thought i might find you out here, when you sit out here you look like the grieving partner" Tristan said as he winked at me.
In away i was, i missed her so much every second i was away from her hurt, my body new she was gone but my mind knew better.
She was alive
"how are u holding up?" Tristan asked me when i didn’t answer him.
He sat down on the roof ledge next to me.
"I miss her so much Tristan, i can’t even describe how much it hurts but i guess you know what with Amelia."
"Ha yes i know that feeling all too well but Chelsea is more important and more of a better person then what Amelia turned into."
"What do you mean i thought what you two had been perfect?"
"It was once when we were both human it was better than perfect if that’s possible but when she disappeared and when I found her again she wasn’t the same person anymore."
"Because she was a vampire?" i asked him i didn’t really know there story.
"Yes you know in my head i made up all these things that i thought where perfect but in reality they weren’t i realised that when i got her back not just the first time but the second time to ha how many chances can a guy have hay." Tristan joked but this left me wondering.
"What about Demitri he thinks Valentina is a fantasy he dreamed up but she is real what’s going to happen when they are reunited again?"
"Again that’s totally different Valentina is very special just like your Chelsea is because they chose this kind of life Demitri isn’t remembering her human days he is remembering the life they live now."
"Right I see." I didn’t understand his theory but then I didn’t know the whole story with Amelia and i don’t think he would ever tell me or anyone.
"What are you listing to?" I asked him changing the subject
"Ohh erm at the moment I am listing to a song called Cut by Plumb i have a playlist that’s called Jane’s songs."
"Right because that makes complete sense" I said being sarcastic he laughed at me
"You don’t know what I’ve got on here i may have a play list for her but if you listened to the songs then i think you would understand my feelings towards her." Tristan said
"Go on then what other songs do you have on there then?!" I asked him.
"Ok well i have 30 seconds to mars the song is called The Kill?"
"No idea who that is?" Tristan looked shocked at me.
"Ok linkin park?"
"Nope i don’t really listen to music anymore" I told him
"Any more?" Tristan questioned
"yes I use to love singing it was my passion when i was human but since I was changed i don’t like to listen or to sing any more it just leaves a bitter memory of how i use to live"
"Wow You know Afton i can never get a grasp on you so much behind those eyes."
"Any way we aren’t talking about me I want to know these songs you can probably give me names i won’t know them but maybe give me the parts of the songs that make think of your precious Jane" I said slightly angry i didn’t understand there relationship but maybe now I would.
"That’s a good idea ok I will start with 30 seconds to mars :- 'come break me down, bury me bury me i am finished with you, look in my eyes your killing me killing me, all i wanted was you, i tried to be someone else but nothing seemed to change i now know this is who i really am.'"
"Ok that’s romantic." I laughed.
"Ohh there is more wonderful ones like this." Tristan smiled he looked through his iPod and smiled.
"Ok i get the idea you hate her."
"No i don’t hate her i despise her she makes me want to peel out of my own skin she has that look in her eyes that sends me to hell with one look i just can’t believe i fell for her tricks over and over i fell like a fool i really believed i could help her get in and help."
"Jane could never be helped Tristan."
"I saw it once the real Jane and that’s what i fell in love with i battled with myself over and over because I knew it was wrong but to love again but i couldn’t help myself i need to i don’t know make up for what i had done in my past i thought if i could make her love someone then she could become the beautiful person that was hiding behind the monster i later realised that there wasn’t a beautiful person any more it hung on for too long and couldn’t hold on any longer i was blind Afton truly blind." Tristan reveled.
"Well you know now it’s not too late." I told him.
Where his mind is scared me.
"No I’m far too gone to come back from this my days are numbered i understand that it’s fine though I am ready to go."
"No you can’t just give up she wins." i shouted at him
"Afton she already had won she has worn me down and now I am nothing i have nothing left to give."
"You have plenty to give you are helping us to be free why don’t you start a new life with us? Kerry is a beautiful place."
"I would like to see it"
"Well then it’s confirmed you can live with us the others will forgive you." I offered
"Ha no there are wounds that are too deep and me being there would just be reopening them that’s cruel that’s what Jane would want i refuse to do what she wants anymore."
"You’re wrong Tristan"
"I wish I was there is one thing i would like to do before I die."
"And what’s that?" I asked
"To watch the sun rise above the sea while I’m sat on the beach with my arm around the most amazing person in the world the one person who meant everything and we both loved each other unconditionally with no fear of trying to outdo each other with tactics like a war game to know that i could look in her eyes and see happiness and not bitterness."
"And you could have that if you came with us."
"Who would I have that with?" Tristan asked
"I.... I don’t know but." i struggled with words Tristan was set for dying
"No buts..... It’s going to happen Afton. Now do you want to hear my favorite song at the moment?"
"Ok seeing as i can’t seem to change your mind" I said I felt horrid i couldn’t convince him his mind is set and i guess he was happy with his decision who was i to force him to stay.
I placed the headphones and what i heard was just beautiful i never thought it was possible to sum up one person’s heartache and pain in one song we never really know what happens behind closed doors and the hurt one can cause them self. So here is what i heard.
I'm not a stranger
no, i am yours
with crippled anger
and tears that still drip sore
A fragile frame aged
with misery
and when our hearts meet
i know you see
I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i find it when
i am cut
I may seem crazy
or painfully shy
and these scars wouldn’t be
so hidden
if you would just look me
in the eye
i feel alone here and cold
here
though i don’t want to die
but the only anesthetic
that makes me feel anything
kills me inside
I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i find it when
I’m cut...................
pain..........................
I am not alone.................
I am not alone...........................
I am not a stranger
no, I’m yours
with crippled anger
and tears that still drip sore
But i do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i found it when
i was cut..............
I listened to those words and i wanted to save him but he wouldn’t let me and i don’t think he wanted to be saved.
We sat there for a while just talking about Chelsea and how wonderful she truly is and about Tristan’s life before he met us.
So much pain he show me some new songs to which i would have to get when I was home.
Yes that’s right i might start listing to music again, Chelsea would be pleased by this.
As we were sat talking Clare and Marvel came out to us.
"Ohh we didn’t expect you to two to be together does Jane know your here Tristan?" Claire said rather bitter.
"I'm comforting a friend who has just lost his reason for living this immortal life and Jane isn’t my keeper." Tristan spat back.
i didn’t move i had to play numb they expected me to fight back but i was done fighting for now i had to store all my energy for the last battle.
Marvel made a 'huh' sound when Tristan said Jane wasn’t his keeper, it made me so mad.
"Sorry we missed the Memorial Afton i hear it was a fond farewell" Claire added.
Bitch i thought I could rip her head of right now, i wanted to so badly i tried to give myself the saddest look possible.
I turned, looked at them.
Marvel backed off like a wimp, I stood up and glared at Clare
"You were never invited to it, you did not know my wife she meant nothing to you so why would you want to say good bye, but she hasn’t gone she is still here in my heart in my mind she lives there now. There will never be a fare well." I said to freak them out.
"Yes of course she is Afton of course she is" Claire giggled.
i moved forward and Tristan jumped up and pulled me back.
" i think you two should leave Afton to grieve for his wife." Tristan suggested.
"We have questions that need answers." Marvel said.
"You have questions? You have questions do you really well I have some of my own." I Spat out
"Like?" Claire asked.
"Like when will Jane be punished for my wife’s death?"
"Do you have evidence to suggest Jane did it?" Claire asked.
She believed Jane did it excellent the plan was working.
Tristan had to hold me back now for affect and I could smell the slimy little dwarf that was called Jane.
Our Plan could have failed in that instant
"I would leave now if you know what’s good for you both, i don’t think I can hold him much longer" I struggled in Tristan’s arms and he spoke like he was really trying to hold me down.
They both walked past us and jumped of the roof.
"Why have you let them go they need to answer my question, something needs to be done about her death" I collapsed to the floor. "She's gone isn’t she, she isn’t coming back what’s going to happen when i can’t remember her when I can’t remember what she smells like w....w...w..." Tristan soothed me and whispered i was doing a good Job then she was in front of us.
"Pathetic you are pathetic Afton would Chelsea want you to be crying like a baby? No she would want you to be dead to."
"Jane." Tristan shouted at her shocked by her reaction.
"No she is true she wouldn’t want me to exist to be alone to be sad but she would also want revenge and what better person to kill the one who ripped her head off." I growled at her.
"Hay you’re looking at the wrong person Afton, Chelsea was my friend the person you should be looking to kill is Claire she killed Chelsea" Jane said looking serious such a good actor.
"W.....what N........no you were arguing before you killed her." My words stumbled out
"No Afton we argued but that was it, it was a stupid little argument it’s what we did."
I stood there looking confused and not knowing who killed her, Jane loved this placing doubt into my mind ha the last laugh was on Jane she commanded Tristan to come with her and he had to, to play along as they walked off i followed and Tristan sang a line of a song he was talking about earlier and i tried not to laugh Jane didn’t understand why he was singing it she quizzed him but he told her that is was apparently Chelsea favorite song here was the line he sang.
Not ready to let go
cause then I'll never know
what could be missing
but I’m missing way too much
when do i give up
what I’ve been wishing for
Ok so this is it i can’t do any more it just feels so wrong i can’t sit and write this anymore i refuse to all this heartache should never be relived no one’s needs to hear it i am putting my foot down on this, this is the last time you will hear of Volterra and the those secrets will stay hidden forever.........
Afton...
I am sorry diary But Afton has banned me from writing about Volterra as you guessed from his last words to you and i will respect his wishes only because of what happened on Derrymore beach Tristan got his wish....................Chelsea.xxxxxxxxxx
i hope you slept well yes? Ahh good well Afton is here to write in you i must say i am interested in this bit i want to hear what my husband got up to while i wasn’t there, Afton is a very good looking vampire and well with me gone who knows who wanted a bit of him you won’t lie to me or keep secrets what Afton shares with you, you will tell me right? “Chelsea you’re doing it again hunny it’s a diary to write your thoughts down not a friend" what’s that you will tell me? Ahh thank you diary here is Afton for you.
Ok here i am made to write in you again, we are not even at the good bit yet the fighting scene well that’s just amazing, I’m joking by the way all of this totally pointless it was a fair fight and the better clan one there end of story.
Fine i am being shouted at to finish the story it’s not worth the fight with my wife she is tactful and all ways wins mostly because she doesn’t look very good angry her face gets wrinkles not an attractive look i am so glad she will never age otherwise i mite of had to dump her for a younger model ha-ha you see this is how Chelsea thinks she assumes when she is out of the picture i am ready to go find a new mate how wrong she is the truth is i would love to of grown old with her to meet her and know its love at first sight, for us to go on dates and just human stuff but that wasn’t possible when i met Chelsea i was already a vampire i could smell this beautiful scent it called to me almond and vanilla, sweet but nutty that’s my wife summed up in one ha no she is far more to me then that i followed the scent and it bought me into this club she was dancing when i first laid eyes on her lost in her own world she didn’t notice me or anyone i sat in that club all night and watched her dance after i left i wanted to find out about this beauty i gathered all my information she was a sad lonely girl ran away from home and this was her job making as much money she can to pay the jerk who owned the club he pushed his girls into more than dancing and Chelsea often did little extras that’s how i stole her since that day we haven’t been apart maybe a day at the most but now she was gone to get help and i had no idea when i would see her Chelsea thinks that i just thought Ohh well who is next to come and take her place no one could ever take her place never i sat outside at night where i saw her last and i kept her image in my head.
Tristan joined me he was listing to some music on his iPod.
He took out his head phones
"Thought i might find you out here, when you sit out here you look like the grieving partner" Tristan said as he winked at me.
In away i was, i missed her so much every second i was away from her hurt, my body new she was gone but my mind knew better.
She was alive
"how are u holding up?" Tristan asked me when i didn’t answer him.
He sat down on the roof ledge next to me.
"I miss her so much Tristan, i can’t even describe how much it hurts but i guess you know what with Amelia."
"Ha yes i know that feeling all too well but Chelsea is more important and more of a better person then what Amelia turned into."
"What do you mean i thought what you two had been perfect?"
"It was once when we were both human it was better than perfect if that’s possible but when she disappeared and when I found her again she wasn’t the same person anymore."
"Because she was a vampire?" i asked him i didn’t really know there story.
"Yes you know in my head i made up all these things that i thought where perfect but in reality they weren’t i realised that when i got her back not just the first time but the second time to ha how many chances can a guy have hay." Tristan joked but this left me wondering.
"What about Demitri he thinks Valentina is a fantasy he dreamed up but she is real what’s going to happen when they are reunited again?"
"Again that’s totally different Valentina is very special just like your Chelsea is because they chose this kind of life Demitri isn’t remembering her human days he is remembering the life they live now."
"Right I see." I didn’t understand his theory but then I didn’t know the whole story with Amelia and i don’t think he would ever tell me or anyone.
"What are you listing to?" I asked him changing the subject
"Ohh erm at the moment I am listing to a song called Cut by Plumb i have a playlist that’s called Jane’s songs."
"Right because that makes complete sense" I said being sarcastic he laughed at me
"You don’t know what I’ve got on here i may have a play list for her but if you listened to the songs then i think you would understand my feelings towards her." Tristan said
"Go on then what other songs do you have on there then?!" I asked him.
"Ok well i have 30 seconds to mars the song is called The Kill?"
"No idea who that is?" Tristan looked shocked at me.
"Ok linkin park?"
"Nope i don’t really listen to music anymore" I told him
"Any more?" Tristan questioned
"yes I use to love singing it was my passion when i was human but since I was changed i don’t like to listen or to sing any more it just leaves a bitter memory of how i use to live"
"Wow You know Afton i can never get a grasp on you so much behind those eyes."
"Any way we aren’t talking about me I want to know these songs you can probably give me names i won’t know them but maybe give me the parts of the songs that make think of your precious Jane" I said slightly angry i didn’t understand there relationship but maybe now I would.
"That’s a good idea ok I will start with 30 seconds to mars :- 'come break me down, bury me bury me i am finished with you, look in my eyes your killing me killing me, all i wanted was you, i tried to be someone else but nothing seemed to change i now know this is who i really am.'"
"Ok that’s romantic." I laughed.
"Ohh there is more wonderful ones like this." Tristan smiled he looked through his iPod and smiled.
"Ok i get the idea you hate her."
"No i don’t hate her i despise her she makes me want to peel out of my own skin she has that look in her eyes that sends me to hell with one look i just can’t believe i fell for her tricks over and over i fell like a fool i really believed i could help her get in and help."
"Jane could never be helped Tristan."
"I saw it once the real Jane and that’s what i fell in love with i battled with myself over and over because I knew it was wrong but to love again but i couldn’t help myself i need to i don’t know make up for what i had done in my past i thought if i could make her love someone then she could become the beautiful person that was hiding behind the monster i later realised that there wasn’t a beautiful person any more it hung on for too long and couldn’t hold on any longer i was blind Afton truly blind." Tristan reveled.
"Well you know now it’s not too late." I told him.
Where his mind is scared me.
"No I’m far too gone to come back from this my days are numbered i understand that it’s fine though I am ready to go."
"No you can’t just give up she wins." i shouted at him
"Afton she already had won she has worn me down and now I am nothing i have nothing left to give."
"You have plenty to give you are helping us to be free why don’t you start a new life with us? Kerry is a beautiful place."
"I would like to see it"
"Well then it’s confirmed you can live with us the others will forgive you." I offered
"Ha no there are wounds that are too deep and me being there would just be reopening them that’s cruel that’s what Jane would want i refuse to do what she wants anymore."
"You’re wrong Tristan"
"I wish I was there is one thing i would like to do before I die."
"And what’s that?" I asked
"To watch the sun rise above the sea while I’m sat on the beach with my arm around the most amazing person in the world the one person who meant everything and we both loved each other unconditionally with no fear of trying to outdo each other with tactics like a war game to know that i could look in her eyes and see happiness and not bitterness."
"And you could have that if you came with us."
"Who would I have that with?" Tristan asked
"I.... I don’t know but." i struggled with words Tristan was set for dying
"No buts..... It’s going to happen Afton. Now do you want to hear my favorite song at the moment?"
"Ok seeing as i can’t seem to change your mind" I said I felt horrid i couldn’t convince him his mind is set and i guess he was happy with his decision who was i to force him to stay.
I placed the headphones and what i heard was just beautiful i never thought it was possible to sum up one person’s heartache and pain in one song we never really know what happens behind closed doors and the hurt one can cause them self. So here is what i heard.
I'm not a stranger
no, i am yours
with crippled anger
and tears that still drip sore
A fragile frame aged
with misery
and when our hearts meet
i know you see
I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i find it when
i am cut
I may seem crazy
or painfully shy
and these scars wouldn’t be
so hidden
if you would just look me
in the eye
i feel alone here and cold
here
though i don’t want to die
but the only anesthetic
that makes me feel anything
kills me inside
I do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i find it when
I’m cut...................
pain..........................
I am not alone.................
I am not alone...........................
I am not a stranger
no, I’m yours
with crippled anger
and tears that still drip sore
But i do not want to be afraid
I do not want to die inside
just to breathe in
I'm tired of feeling so numb
relief exists i found it when
i was cut..............
I listened to those words and i wanted to save him but he wouldn’t let me and i don’t think he wanted to be saved.
We sat there for a while just talking about Chelsea and how wonderful she truly is and about Tristan’s life before he met us.
So much pain he show me some new songs to which i would have to get when I was home.
Yes that’s right i might start listing to music again, Chelsea would be pleased by this.
As we were sat talking Clare and Marvel came out to us.
"Ohh we didn’t expect you to two to be together does Jane know your here Tristan?" Claire said rather bitter.
"I'm comforting a friend who has just lost his reason for living this immortal life and Jane isn’t my keeper." Tristan spat back.
i didn’t move i had to play numb they expected me to fight back but i was done fighting for now i had to store all my energy for the last battle.
Marvel made a 'huh' sound when Tristan said Jane wasn’t his keeper, it made me so mad.
"Sorry we missed the Memorial Afton i hear it was a fond farewell" Claire added.
Bitch i thought I could rip her head of right now, i wanted to so badly i tried to give myself the saddest look possible.
I turned, looked at them.
Marvel backed off like a wimp, I stood up and glared at Clare
"You were never invited to it, you did not know my wife she meant nothing to you so why would you want to say good bye, but she hasn’t gone she is still here in my heart in my mind she lives there now. There will never be a fare well." I said to freak them out.
"Yes of course she is Afton of course she is" Claire giggled.
i moved forward and Tristan jumped up and pulled me back.
" i think you two should leave Afton to grieve for his wife." Tristan suggested.
"We have questions that need answers." Marvel said.
"You have questions? You have questions do you really well I have some of my own." I Spat out
"Like?" Claire asked.
"Like when will Jane be punished for my wife’s death?"
"Do you have evidence to suggest Jane did it?" Claire asked.
She believed Jane did it excellent the plan was working.
Tristan had to hold me back now for affect and I could smell the slimy little dwarf that was called Jane.
Our Plan could have failed in that instant
"I would leave now if you know what’s good for you both, i don’t think I can hold him much longer" I struggled in Tristan’s arms and he spoke like he was really trying to hold me down.
They both walked past us and jumped of the roof.
"Why have you let them go they need to answer my question, something needs to be done about her death" I collapsed to the floor. "She's gone isn’t she, she isn’t coming back what’s going to happen when i can’t remember her when I can’t remember what she smells like w....w...w..." Tristan soothed me and whispered i was doing a good Job then she was in front of us.
"Pathetic you are pathetic Afton would Chelsea want you to be crying like a baby? No she would want you to be dead to."
"Jane." Tristan shouted at her shocked by her reaction.
"No she is true she wouldn’t want me to exist to be alone to be sad but she would also want revenge and what better person to kill the one who ripped her head off." I growled at her.
"Hay you’re looking at the wrong person Afton, Chelsea was my friend the person you should be looking to kill is Claire she killed Chelsea" Jane said looking serious such a good actor.
"W.....what N........no you were arguing before you killed her." My words stumbled out
"No Afton we argued but that was it, it was a stupid little argument it’s what we did."
I stood there looking confused and not knowing who killed her, Jane loved this placing doubt into my mind ha the last laugh was on Jane she commanded Tristan to come with her and he had to, to play along as they walked off i followed and Tristan sang a line of a song he was talking about earlier and i tried not to laugh Jane didn’t understand why he was singing it she quizzed him but he told her that is was apparently Chelsea favorite song here was the line he sang.
Not ready to let go
cause then I'll never know
what could be missing
but I’m missing way too much
when do i give up
what I’ve been wishing for
Ok so this is it i can’t do any more it just feels so wrong i can’t sit and write this anymore i refuse to all this heartache should never be relived no one’s needs to hear it i am putting my foot down on this, this is the last time you will hear of Volterra and the those secrets will stay hidden forever.........
Afton...
I am sorry diary But Afton has banned me from writing about Volterra as you guessed from his last words to you and i will respect his wishes only because of what happened on Derrymore beach Tristan got his wish....................Chelsea.xxxxxxxxxx
